Friday, June 14, 2002

Freeze two metal bookends overnight. Strip to the waist. Invite a stranger into the room. Press the bookends against your breast. Smash the bookends together as hard as you can. Set an appointment with the stranger to meet next year. and do it again.

That's right, boys and girls, today is (drumroll....)... Mammogram Day!

I'm one of those lucky gals that actually has enough mammoflesh that my parts don't get pulled and squeezed like my A-cup best friend's do. By the time she's properly positioned for the machine, the skin that ends up being squished on the X-ray plate is coming from her neck and abdomen.

Anyhoo, results will arrive by mail in about a week. All you ladies doing your monthly self-exams and so forth?


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